|
The
original title of "Corky Romano" was "Corky
Romano: 'Special' Agent," the word special engulfed in
quotes. The last portion of that title was dropped shortly
before its release, most likely the result of studio execs
fearing attacks for lack of sensitivity toward the mentally
challenged. If they really wanted to show their sensitivity,
however, they would have axed this movie altogether and spared
us the pain of witnessing it.
The
film is an exercise in comic constipation. Not only is the
premise tired, but director Rob Pritts displays no sense of
comic timing, and the screenplay offers nothing--and I mean
nothing-- of humorous value. (Unless lines like: "Okay,
Romano, we got a little meeting between your testicles and my
knife!" are supposed to be funny. You tell me.)
While
not another spinoff of a Saturday Night Live skit, the film does
star SNL's Chris Kattan, who in interviews seems like a likable
kid, eager to please, and ready to make an ass of himself if
it'll garner a laugh. Hey, there's nothing wrong with that. (Jim
Carrey has done pretty well after beginning that way.) In the
hands of a director who might know best how to channel his
abundant energy, the boy could shine one day. But here he's
submarined by filmmakers who require many many many more lessons
in the Farrelly Brothers School of Setting Up and Executing
Jokes.
Kattan
plays the title character, a sweet-natured but incredibly clumsy
assistant veterinarian whose biggest dream is to eliminate the
word "assistant" from his nametag. One day he receives
a call from his father (Peter Falk) whom he hasn't seen in
years. Dad is an underworld crime lord who is facing a trial in
two weeks and needs someone to infiltrate the FBI and destroy
the evidence against him. Corky doesn't know about poppa's real
job, believing him to be a landscaper. See, he was cast out from
his family because they felt his clumsy behavior wouldn't fit
with the mafia lifestyle. But in these tough times, he is the
only possible solution, much to the chagrin of his older
brothers (Peter Berg and Chris Penn).
By
way of a fake resume, he is given the name Agent Pissant (witty,
huh?) and is granted access to FBI headquarters. His false
credentials impress his superior (Richard Roundtree) and
immediately earn him an enemy aptly named Agent Brick Davis
(Matthew Glave). We also have the obligatory love interest (Vinessa
Shaw) whose sole purpose is to hate Corky until page whatever in
the script when she must trust and admire him. Will Corky
perform the illegal task? Will he learn about the true
occupation of his father? Does it really matter?
In
addition to the glaring ineptitude, the movie isn't helped by
the fact that all the actors seem painfully aware of the garbage
through which they've unfortunately elected to trudge. Peter
Falk, Fred Ward, Peter Berg, Chris Penn, Richard
Roundtree--they're all better than this material, and judging by
the deservedly phoned-in performances, I'm sure they realized
it, albeit a tad too late. I suppose Kattan does what he can,
but he isn't given the luxury of having anything to play off of
here. Like a jacked-up bull in a vermilion-tinted china shop, he
plows through the story but offers no real redeeming value.
Basically, he's just more shrapnel.
Director
Pritts and writers David Garrett and Jason Ward seem to have
comic targets in mind, but don't know how to proceed from there.
The movie wants to crack jokes at the expense of Corky's
mean-spirited brothers. Fine. How do they do that? Well, they
imbed one with homosexual tendencies, and make the other
illiterate. And that's it. It'd be one thing if they launched
bits of humor based on the aforementioned traits, but they
don't. I guess we're supposed to laugh at the site of one
brother unable to read an ice cream menu and another being
referred to as a "faggot." You can get away with cruel
humor if there's an actual joke attached, but expecting the
audience to laugh merely at the sight or sound of such things
doesn't really work. (Yes, it was cruel of the main characters
in "Dumb and Dumber" to sell a blind boy a dead
parakeet to make some much-needed cash. But at least it was a
joke. An actual, easily-identifiable joke. I really took things
like that for granted until this mess.)
Without
a knack for executing effective gags, the filmmakers try their
hardest to squeeze humor from their idea, not realizing that the
sponge is completely dry. One scene has Corky trying to blow an
enormous fart. His face turns bright red as he pushes with all
his might, only to release a tiny squeak of intestinal gas. You
know, I never would have guessed that a scene of the sort could
be so symbolic.
TOP
|
